{4 minutes to read}  Creating a parenting schedule for divorcing spouses is not an easy task when each of them wants to have the children for as much time as possible. Parents can agree on a primary custodial parent who will have the children on more overnights than the non-custodial parent, or they can opt for a 50/50 schedule and each of them has equal time with the children.  

The 50/50 model offers many possibilities such as a 7-7 schedule where the children spend seven consecutive days with each parent. Or a 2-2-3? Or perhaps a 5-2-2-5 schedule? No one [...]

Thu, Apr 08, 2021
Source: Safian Mediation

{4 minutes to read}  Going through hard times in your relationship with your partner? Incidents keep coming up, end up in fights, and never get resolved? Time and time again, your attempts to resolve issues turn sour, and resentments build up as the list of grievances grows? How does one take a step back, address issues, and work through them without attacks (which lead nowhere)? 

Last year, I published an article based on a Wall Street Journal (WSJ) piece on this topic. Here are 10 additional tips which you might find helpful when facing a difficult conversation:

1. Tell [...]

Wed, Mar 24, 2021
Source: Safian Mediation

{4 minutes to read}  It is no secret that bringing new partners into an existing parent-child relationship presents challenges. In blended families, parents and stepparents alike need to navigate these waters successfully and make room for the child’s emotions by momentarily setting aside their own. 

If you are in a blended family, you might want to take the time to listen to the entire podcast as two therapists advise a woman named Priscilla on how to handle her relationship with her boyfriend’s children.

Background Story

Priscilla is divorced and has no children. Her boyfriend has a six-year-old girl and an eight-year-old boy [...]

Tue, Mar 09, 2021
Source: Safian Mediation

{3 minutes to read}  Why do we have to bring all our bank, brokerage, and retirement account statements to our mediation session if we have agreed to each keep our own and not share any of the money we have in our separate names? 

Dear Divorcing Husband & Wife,

New York State is a state of Equitable Distribution whereby all marital assets, meaning those earned during the marriage, are usually divided. You may agree to waive rights to each other’s accounts and possessions. Couples have different reasons to do this: they are both financially secure, they may want the process to be [...]

Thu, Feb 25, 2021
Source: Safian Mediation

{3 minutes to read}  Co-parenting after divorce is most successful if you can agree with your former spouse on similar rules regarding your children’s activities and schedules. If you can also align your expectations on issues such as school and homework, meals and bedtimes, and extracurricular activities, your children will adjust more easily as they navigate from one home to another.

One of the questions that seem to come up most frequently in this Covid era is the usage of electronic devices aside from the time children spend online for school. How much time should they spend:

Playing games on their tablets,  FaceTiming [...]
Wed, Feb 10, 2021
Source: Safian Mediation
HLA - Our Practice Makes PerfectIn order to stay within a client’s comfort zone, we attorneys sometimes end up going with a second-best option.  The purpose of this article is to provide a better understanding of land trusts, so real estate investors do not miss out on an optimal strategy.

Previously, we looked at 10 advantages of a land trust [Florida land trust].  The purpose of that article was to make people aware of the possibilities with this truly useful vehicle.

I find that clients who are unfamiliar with trusts will almost invariably decide in favor [...]

Mon, Feb 08, 2021
Source: Harrington Law Associates

{3 minutes to read}  In this article, I would like to acknowledge some of the moments in mediation sessions that often trigger painful feelings for some people going through a divorce. One party may be more sensitive to one issue while the other party may be more sensitive to another. It is not unusual that the parties themselves may be taken by surprise when they find themselves overcome by such intense emotions. We must allow them space to express their emotions, whether tears, sudden silence, heavy breathing, or other signals.

Bringing to light some of these episodes can help others in [...]

Fri, Jan 29, 2021
Source: Safian Mediation
HLA - Our Practice Makes PerfectBiden’s immigration platform is much less restrictive than what we have seen under the Trump administration.  Biden has promised to immediately reverse Trump-era policies, focusing first on high-profile issues like DACA, Muslim bans, and asylees (i.e. separation of children from their parents).

The rhetoric from the Biden team has been of tolerance and reconciliation, so there is reason to believe there is good news for immigrants and visa-holders.  That said, the US is not exempt from the heightened security and rising anti-immigrant sentiment around the world, and not everyone is in favor of loosening restrictions put [...]

Fri, Jan 15, 2021
Source: Harrington Law Associates

{4 minutes to read}  Rachel Moheban-Wachter, a therapist on my team, discusses an issue many of us are guilty of, and which often causes unnecessary conflict. For example:

Husband: Honey, do you want me to go with you to the doctor?

Wife: No, you don’t need to. I am fine going alone. It’s not an important visit this time.

H: Ok

Next day, the Wife is very upset and constantly snapping at her Husband.

H: What’s wrong?

W: I am really hurt that you did not come with me to the doctor. Didn’t you know that [...]

Wed, Jan 13, 2021
Source: Safian Mediation
Harrington Legal Alliance
HLA - Our Practice Makes PerfectIn our business and real estate practice, clients sometimes ask whether DocuSign and similar apps are a good idea.  They want to know if e-signatures are risky.

E-signing technology is becoming more and more prevalent, and there is no denying the convenience.  Affixing your signature with a simple tap on your phone screen is a beautiful thing.  After all, the alternative is to print the document, sign it, scan, and then email the scanned copy.  Sometimes you have to go find witnesses, and, if notarization is required . . . well, now you really got yourself [...]

Wed, Dec 09, 2020
Source: Harrington Law Associates

{5 minutes to read}  Tim and Sandy are both Japanese American. They have two boys ages 10 and 13. While Tim was born in the US, Sandy was born in Japan and emigrated to the US with her family as a young child.

Sandy is very insistent that her children go to Japanese school on Saturdays so they can learn the language and understand more of their culture.

Tim says that they speak Japanese at home and would rather they attend sports activities on those days so that they can better integrate into the American way [...]

Wed, Dec 09, 2020
Source: Safian Mediation

President Donald J. Trump attended New York Military Academy as a teenager, and Peter Ticktin was his classmate and friend. In this memoir, Ticktin shares some of his insights about President Trump, and how this time in NYMA molded his character and determination.

The military academy forces boys to grow up quickly, as they learn how to navigate the bullies and respect authority. This training can either make or break them, and President Trump was one who thrived in this environment. As a result, Ticktin believes that President Trump learned to fear no one and to always do what is right [...]

Tue, Dec 08, 2020
Source: Legal Brains